Status Updates

Lately, all I have been doing is thinking in Status Updates. It is a problem. I narrate my entire live in the 3rd person in 1 to 2 second clips. So, to indulge myself, here is a day as it would appear in a facebook status update:

Sarah Brower Zuidema woke up on the wrong side of bed. So I climbed over my husband in order to get a better start on my day.

SBZ hopes the 2 bowls of pure fiber she had for breakfast do not backfire.

SBZ wonders why the person in front of her feels the need to drive just slow enough to be annoying, but just fast enough not to be passed.

SBZ sang really loud to Legally Blonde for the 30 minute commute to work. I think I will audition

SBZ needs to keep kleenex in her car.

SBZ is moving to Canada in hopes that their government has a phone number you can call. We live in a society people! A democracy! Ever heard of communication?

SBZ wrote a very unprofessional letter to the Department of Homeland Security, Immigration division which she promptly deleted and then wrote a professional one. She feels a little better.

SBZ wonders how many times it is humanly possible for one child to say "MOMMY!!!!! Watch me!"

SBZ realized the lettuce is too overgrown to be picked so I better check out the beans

SBZ thinks gardening is not worth the effort.

SBZ thinks no matter what she offers for supper, one child will complain. Cook it yourself you little smarty pants!

SBZ had to rent her CD's from the library using about 16 nickels and 20 pennies. She had a few "looks" from other patrons

SBZ found an old bag of gummie bears in the cupboard while looking for missing scissors. Thank goodness for missing scissors.

SBZ's daughter asked for chocolate chips by saying "I saw mom eating them yesterday!" Dang, foiled again

SBZ thinks she needs to be more discreet with her chocolate consumption.

SBZ read 4 bed time stories, sang 2 songs and delivered the standard bedtime prayer. Now she is listening to her kids yell, "Mom, you forgot to sing us songs!" "Mom, we need our prayer!"

SBZ is contemplating a walk on the treadmill...And she should not have sat down to think about it since she is now reading a book

SBZ is laying in bed mentally writing a blog about status updates...